I have been living in Louisville for a week now. I feel unsure and unsettled and unknown.

Mondays are my Sabbath rest. My plan for today was to spend my time writing and reflecting on God’s word. However, instead of taking care of myself and spending time with God, I chose to try to “fix” how I’ve been feeling, focusing on crafting a more comfortable space and feel more sure of my surroundings. Only having one day off a week, I chose to get things done rather than waste this precious day.

However, as I have learned many times before, even though I have had a very productive day, I have come to its conclusion drained and unsatisfied rather than rested and refreshed. I am now sitting at an unfamiliar kitchen table at 10 p.m. trying to process my day.

I originally started taking a weekly Sabbath in the spring after reading the book Keeping the Sabbath Wholly by Marva Dawn. This book completely changed the way I viewed work and rest and was a major inspiration for me taking a two week extended Sabbath in June: something that resulted in me hearing God quietly whispering to me that I was free to follow Him alone rather than things I thought He was expecting of me. This resulted in me changing my plan for the year and starting this blog in the first place.

Today.

The only thing I could muster to bring to the Lord’s presence were these words: Jesus I feel out of place here in every sense.

Still, I feel Jesus smiling and chuckling at me. He is taking my hand, saying, “Sophia, Sophia, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Choose me. I will not be taken away from you.”

He reminds me that although I feel unsure of my situation, I can be sure of who He is. Though I feel unsettled, I can rest in the constancy of His presence, my true refuge and home. Though I feel unknown and unpursued, God knows me fully and pursues me relentlessly.

I am posting this to set a precedent of how I will spend my Mondays from here on out: simply resting in God’s presence.

So, I hereby commit to spend each Monday clinging to these truths about God’s character and surrendering to His grace. Practically, this will look like trying to post something new every Monday as accountability to make the choice to forgo spending the day being productive in order to sweetly waste the day with God.

Actual updates coming soon.

Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her. Luke 10: 41-42